Monday, April 9, 2012

The David and Sean Tooth Extraction Method or (D.S.T.E.M.)

Step 1.) Wait until thirty minutes before your little sister's birthday party. This way your mom and dad will be busy and distracted from what you're doing.

Step 2.) Find your most powerful Nerf gun and about three bullets. Be sure to use the bullets with the hard plastic tips.

Step 3.) Since you know you'll get in trouble shooting your brother in the mouth with a nerf gun, be sure and get your brother's permission this way you're in on it together. Don't bother asking your parents for permission. Afterall, they're busy with the party and they won't mind the mouth shooting since it's serving a utilitarian purpose. But if you get caught make sure both of you are smiling it will make it look like you're working together. Parents like it when their kids are getting along.

Step 4.) If the Nerf gun doesn't complete the extraction you will need to find some string. This may create a problem because it's now 15 minutes until your sisters birthday. If your mom cleaned your room over the weekend and threw away your kite string, you'll need parental assistance.

Step 5.) If your mom says she doesn't have any string, don't let that slow you down. Go to the junk drawer and just start digging. You'll have to really dig and drag things out to make sure there isn't any string. If your mom complains that your making a mess while she's trying to clean for the party just keep sharing the big picture. Talk about how badly Sean wants this tooth pulled, how great it will be to have the tooth fairy come for a visit along the birthday festivities and Easter bunny!

Step 6.) You might be met with resistance with the string on the door knob method. Now it's time to find Dad's tools. You'll need a pair of pliers. Go to the closet where dad keeps his tools and just dump them out in the entry way. Again, mom won't mind. She seemed  excited about the Tooth Fairy and the Easter bunny coming. After all she said, "Yeah, that would be JUST GREAT!"

Step 7.) You're running out of time now. It's time to leave for your sister's party. So just go in the bathroom and have your oldest brother yank that tooth out! You might get blood all over the place but mom will clean that up. The important thing to remember is to work as a team and don't let anything get in your way! Good luck! Let us know how this works out for you!

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